BDSM is Love

A scene is a BDSM playtime and can involve one or many different activities. For those vanilla (non-BDSM) folk out there it would be equivalent to setting up a romantic night with your lover. You set up candles and fresh sheets maybe, you know what you want to wear and hopefully what you want to do. A BDSM scene is no different. Things are normally discussed as to what is going to happen, you set up the room or area that you are going to do it in and then you begin.

The scene (note the difference) is the BDSM community at large. When someone may ask you if you are active in the scene, it means they want to know if you are in any groups, have been to any large events, etc. I will use these words frequently within the posts today, so make sure you understand the different connotation.

When you participate in a scene there are a few steps to the process…

Negociation: This is where you discuss your limits, what you want to happen, what toys you do/don’t want used on you and what places on your body are no go zones. Parnters that play a lot or are commited can and do skip this phase, but I am strongly against doing that if you don’t know your partner well enough.

Activity: Um.. this is where you do what you talked about doing

Aftercare: This is the end of the scene. You will want to drink water, care for each other, hold each other, eat, whatever you need to connect on an emotional level and just come down from the feelings that occured during the activity.

–luna

Enya - Boadicea