Miss Me?
So, ten days after I took a hiatus, I’m back. I think. I’ve been writing personal blog posts to Master on paper. He’s actually liked them because they are more personal. I agree. I write just for him then. This whole blog should be just for him. I should be writing like I do on paper right here. I need to remember my focus.
The reason for my disappearance is still a shock to me. Master removed my collar. He had every reason to do it, and I agree with his decision; even though I ache for it back with every fiber of my being. He said that I have not been very submissive since my punishment ended in July. He said that if there is no submissive there can be no D/s, and in essence the collar that symbolizes that bond between Dominant and submissive does not exist. I can earn it back, but it’s going to require a lot of work on my part. I have to get to the root and then correct myself.
Master has begun to give me assignments due weekly. I’ve done 2 of them so far, and this week is a free week. These he has given me permission to share on my blog so I know at some point soon I will be posting them and the future ones. They are hard essays for me, personal in nature and I hope they are helping him see how I think and feel.
I have received my first corset. I know before I left I talked about getting one. I have a picture to share with you guys. Let me know what you think. At full cinch it reduces my waist 3 inches. I think it’s a decent starter corset. I just have to get used to sitting in it; standing is fine.
So, back to my loss of collar… I’m terrified that I won’t get it back, or that I will just not get there in time. There’s no timeframe but I still feel the countdown above my head. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know how to do it. I just know I have to do it.
–luna
Tagged as beg, D/s, focus, future, Master, punishment, submissive, work + Categorized as Uncategorized
great to have you back luna, although very sorry to hear about you collar ~pout~ i truly hope things get better for you.
Also, you look so beautiful in your new corset hun!
kajira{MJ}
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Luna, I know you didn’t ask for advice so take what you want from the following and toss the rest…
For me, I’d have to find which should be my focus.. getting the collar back or finding my submissive heart again. Since your Master hasn’t set a time limit, you need to let retrieving your collar go. It seems to me that His focus is your heart and as long as He sees progress, He’ll allow your journey to continue. I don’t know the specifics of your struggle, but I know you can find it once again.
When I lose focus on a goal, I return to the beginning… find what was the source of it from the start… compare it to what I am now, make adjustments, then continue on hopefully having my first love restored, but goals intact.
These words are meant as an encouragement only. I know you are working hard to find your way.
Hugs,
snick
[Reply]
It is good to see you posting again. I am so sorry for the collar. Sending good thoughts your way!
You look very pretty in your corset!
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