BDSM is Love

With just a little bit of snow on the ground and the wind whipping around like a banshee it makes me feel the magic of Christmas even more. I don’t know or understand why I am looking forward to this holiday any more than previous ones. We don’t have any more money or have any different plans than last year. It’s the same ole’ day. Perhaps I feel it might be a romantic day? Perhaps kinky? Who knows. All I know is that mushy Christmas songs get my heart swelling and my mind drifting off to fantasy island.

My steamy mug of hot cocoa and a warm home sure makes me feel all sensual. Or it could be the lack of sex. Master and I don’t do anything during my period and it feels they drag on for weeks; even if 5-7 days is the norm. While he reminds me on numerous occasions that I could always please him, and I have…. I just get more frustrated. I can’t wait till hopefully tomorrow when my system is all cleared out and he gives the green light for loving. I’ve needed him so bad, very bad.

It’s amazing to me how much I don’t miss masturbating unless I’ve not had sex recently. I thought that I’d miss it terribly and that I’d be asking to masturbate for Master often, almost obsessively. I’ve not had a desire to do it for over a month. I’m to the point now that I’d like to ask for an orgasm. It’s been over a week and I’ve been frustrated my entire period. It’s just so unfair!

I lost 2 lbs this last week. I’m encouraged to see how well I do before the end of the year. While I’m hyper excited… I’ve been at this weight before numerous times, I do know that at some point I will break this plateau. Master worked out with me tonight. It made me feel wonderful. All warm inside…

I have the chance for some overtime this week. I’m hoping for some, it would be nice on my Christmas paycheck to have a little extra. My work and the client are in negotiations to move me to full time employment. They told me there has been a lot of positive feedback so it’s likely that early next year I might be working full time! It would save us greatly for me to work 40 hours a week. I’d stress less about money and I’d still be home before 5pm.

–luna