BDSM is Love

It’s been a change to say the least! I am constantly aware of things I need to do before bed or I could get into some serious cane time (not good). I am almost always watchful for what Master may need or desire. Things may come together well.

We also attempted a small play session. The first after I admitted that my trust in Master when it came to play was really bad. I’ve been working with an internal dialog to help release some of that tension and I told Master today that the only way to test my confidence in him was to play a bit. I admitted I would try slow and small sessions to allow my mind to accept Master as someone who will not hurt me, someone I trust and love with my whole heart. Master had me over his knee for a little spanking. It was delicious. I forgot how wonderful it feels to be in his touch and how erotic the pain is when he delivers it. I got all floaty feeling and then he fucked me. Mmm, it was wonderful. I hope we do it again soon. I’ve been missing the SM part of our relationship. Perhaps I’ve been so concentrated on the submissive side because I need the SM part too. One will inevitably lead to another with Master.

I’ve been working on writing some sections for my personal handbook site. I’ve almost got another page done about Anal training. I know this is something that Master wants to do all the time, which is why butt plug wearing is in my rules. Just as soon as I get rid of this darned hemorrhoid I’ll be able to get back to that. I’ve never had one before but I read that if you treat them they will go away 90% of the time without issue. I’m hoping for that. It doesn’t hurt unless it’s irritated. Well anyway when this goes away I’ll be able to start the butt plug training and save up for the plug I really want.

Well, I’m off to shave and prepare for bed. I’ve gotta try to get into doing my routine again. It makes me feel so accomplished.

–luna