BDSM is Love

I’m so happy to be working full time soon. It’s scary to start planning what I want to do with what extra cash we will have. I want to pay up on the bills, move to a better apartment and fix my car. Master asked me what sort of things I wanted to spurge on and I honestly couldn’t think of any at first. It was new plates and kitchen appliances, it was dates and new perfume. He wants to make me happy and give me all the things I’d want; but what I want is time. Time to be with Master, time to enjoy life, trips and events, time to just be. Even though Master lists lots of things he’d like to have and I come up with intangible items. It shows how different and how interesting we are as a couple.

Even though we have to struggle the next several weeks I feel a weight lifted off of me; one that has been there for years. I will be able to become one of the people that doesn’t have to live paycheck to paycheck. One that can have a savings account, decent food and clothing. One that can enjoy whatever it is I want almost at the time I want it. From going out to eat, to seeing a movie to getting that pair of shoes I’m drooling over.

Not that he’ll let me waste money but I’m sure I’ll be able to indulge here and there.

Master mentioned tonight that he can’t see why this blog has a readership. He knows it’s unique, as all blogs are but I guess he can’t see why others would be so interested in what I have to say about my life and our relationship. I know it’s out of a sense of comradeship and friendship that people read my journal. I know it’s not because of the sexy scenes; for I don’t share that much of those things. I know it’s not because of all the pictures, for there aren’t much of those either. I enjoy knowing that people read the blog though. It makes me feel welcome and accepted. No matter who I am or what I go through, my journal will be there and so will all the others who read it.

–luna