Grumble
I hate butt plug training. It’s such a turn off. He reminds me and it just gets me down. Like this evening I was really looking forward to sex since I felt better than this weekend and then he reminds me I have to put this damn rubber thing in my ass. I’m grumpy now, he doesn’t like it, but does that change my mood? Nope. I’m still anti-butt plug.
This isn’t to say that I don’t like anal play though, I just hate this butt plug I wear. All of mine are uncomfortable and some are painful. I’d rather just not do it than suffer as I have to for his enjoyment. Yes I’m bitching. I’m allowed to in my journal. It’s my outside attitude that I have to watch.
It’s one of those moments that I feel like only submitting when I want to, not when I need to. I really need to work on that. I don’t want to be an occasional submissive, but an all the time one. It’s not easy to allow yourself to not get fussy and grumpy though. I don’t understand all of my feelings. I want to submit to Master. I feel the best when I submit, I feel wonderful when I’m a good girl. Why do I feel the need to rebel at any possible weakness?
–luna
Tagged as anal, anal play, butt plug, buttplugs, change, good girl, Just Sex, Master, pain, play, submissive, weekend, work + Categorized as Submission, Training
It’s one of those moments that I feel like only submitting when I want to, not when I need to.
But you still submit, even when you don’t want to, right? That’s the meat of it right there. Submitting to the fun stuff is the easy part.
I grumble my way through LOTS of things (especially the plug. Tack bra. etc etc.) Master says He doesn’t much care how I do it, as long as I do it.
Given permisson to grumble has taken some of the joy out of grumbling too..lol
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Oh my god, no kidding! :w00t:
I felt bad later that I had gotten grumpy and he said, “It’s okay. You did it anyway didn’t you?”
WHAT?! I guess I expected to get in trouble. Yes, I still submit but I feel so badly that I can’t do it without really looking pissy and having a negative attitude.
–luna
[Reply]
This should solve your problem for: I have the Pure Plug 2.0. It’s very comfortable, and is a lot of fun. It’s also a good anal dildo, and is the most secure one I’ve ever used out of dozens, an dozens.
http://www.njoytoys.com/products/pureplug20.php
Same thing in smaller sizes:
http://www.njoytoys.com/products/pureplugs.php
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