BDSM is Love

What is one of your goals at the moment as a submissive?

A huge goal I have right now was actually talked about a little bit in my post last night. I hope to stop questioning Master and doing something without asking questions, saying no or trying to put it off. I’ve got to accept that he cares for me and won’t ask me to do anything that is outside of what I’m capable of doing. I’m still thinking about me, me, me all the time. What will I get out of it? Ya know?

Now the right answer is that you get the love and praise of your Dominant partner. He’s very good at thanking me for doing something for him and for telling me how wonderful I am when I’m doing good. (When I’m bad is another matter.) As of right now I can only accept this for some things and not all things.

The huge stumbling block is when it comes to sexual items.

I have problems with blow jobs. I hate the taste of semen and I gag at the thought of having to swallow. Master leaks a lot and it makes me squirm when I think about giving a blow job. He’s not going to stop asking for them however. I just have to learn to not say no. He’s not harming me; he’s just pushing a boundary. I accept that. Why can’t I accept that he won’t let anything bad happen to me?

I’m terrible at being spontaneous in bed. I need to take action more often and I need to not hesitate. When there is something in my mind to do I should just do it. It will please him and I will get pleasure in return. It is not my role to just lay there and take it. I need to be an active partner too.

I say no to his sexual suggestions a lot. I don’t know why. He’s more attentive to what I need and what I can do sometimes than I am. I have to learn to accept that.

–luna

In 30 minutes…

A thought-provoking quote