BDSM is Love

By Hans Meijer

snippet below:

In order to get a few - indeed quoted way too often - urban legends out of the way first: scientific research shows that the number of people with a traumatic (abuse) history within the erotic power exchange group is no different from any other group.

Since the same research (European as well as American) indicates that between 20 and 50 percent of population has an abuse history, one may safely say the same goes for EPE people, doms and sub alike.

One important thing to notice here is that first of all the term “abuse” is just as vague as “car-accident” and - without a proper definition of what is considered abuse in any particular case - is useless. Abuse - apart from the very obvious cases - is first of all very personal perception by the victim (which does NOT mean to say it is a lesser form of abuse - just that different people have different perceptions) and as such, as science and experts will readily admit, is one of the most difficult things to give a definition for in any more or less general format.

Another thing to remember here is that it is very important to make a distinct difference between different forms of abuse. Juvenal trauma can not be compared to spousal abuse, rape is different for men and women and the worst thing to do is throw everything on one big pile. Which is another reason why the term “abuse” is useless and empty, because it says very little (again not meaning to say that abuse isn’t bad).

Read the rest of the essay here