BDSM is Love

There are tasks I just really don’t like. When Master assigns them but doesn’t give a time frame for completion they sit… and sit… and sit. I can’t wrap my head around the truth of the matter. Master requested that I do something for his pleasure, not mine. This is becoming the case with the new rule of butt plug training ever other day. While many times I have asked to skip it because of health reasons, the times that I have done it aren’t pleasant, they are last minute and mentally painful. I just hate it.

I’ve also put off blow jobs for days at a time. My excuses are weak but he allows them sometimes; with a huge disappointed look on his face. Why that doesn’t deter me I couldn’t say.

He asked that I write something about putting something off for so long and it’s effects on things. I know he dislikes that I put things off that I don’t enjoy. I know that it is human nature to do so. My concern is now how do I change that thought process? I have to do it, to please him and yet try to not be miserable while doing it. There is no mindset for getting out of procrastination.

I know there are submissives out there that will do anything for them Dominant. I know that no matter what it is, they will do it. How can I get to the same place? What is it within me that still has a care about my thoughts and feelings for this; when I should only be caring for what Master’s enjoyment might be?