BDSM is Love

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Thank you everyone who commented on the Thursday Question about experience. It’s a challenging topic, to say the least.

Determining experience is a tricky for anyone. There are a lot of variables in deciding if you are experienced or not. I could say that I’m experienced in that I’ve been living in a D/s relationship for almost 4 years now. But is that really the case? Yes I can say that I’m learning the ropes still but I don’t feel comfortable saying I’m experienced. That really is what it comes down to; comfort.

Experience is being comfortable in your knowledge and time of exposure.

I’m comfortable with my experience in sexual aspects, and I feel that it’s the most easy to be comfortable with. Anyone can explore sex with their partners until they are comfortable with what they want to explore. With Master I’ve experienced a lot of pleasure at his hands. I can only hope that what I have left to experience is with him as well.

I’m comfortable with being a bottom in a scene, although the more intense they are the scarier and more uncertain I am. I’m learning as I go on this one so I can’t say that I’m experienced with intense pain and am not an experienced masochist. I don’t think I’ve moved far past the newbie stage with this one only because of the lack of practice. More practice and confidence in myself would lift my comfort level in this aspect.

I’m still a newbie when it comes to being submissive and I have a sharp learning curve. I think once I stop fighting my urges to be dominant and my desires to be submissive I can develop more into the submissive I need to be and the submissive he wants to be.

(A little aside here, Master says I AM the submissive he wants, he’s just perfecting me and I like it that way. He loves me as I am and will love me just the same as I develop. )

I could enumerate all the activities that Master and I have participated in but that would be a long and boring list. Let’s just say that I’m not 100% experienced in anything.

–luna

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