BDSM is Love

Exposing who we are as Dominant and submissive around people who aren’t party to what we do is dangerous and inappropriate. They have not consented to be party to a scene by anyone. But when it comes to D/s it is who we are and so it can be displayed without harm for those witnessing [...]

In kaya’s post about Stability in Dominants she brings up that she feels the Dominant in the relationship should be more stable than the submissive. The stability she lists are emotional, financial, career choice and mental. She also wanted to know if our standards for partners, especially Dominants, can be too high.
I’d like to say [...]

I am collared… does that mean I am also owned? Are the words synonymous or do they have different meanings?
I’ve read several differnet viewpoints on this subject. The arguments appear to be clear and understood.
Those that argue yes, when you are collared you are also owned cement their belief that when you become collared you [...]

Master and I are quite affectionate towards one another. There isn’t a day that goes by that doesn’t involve romantic and sweet caresses, hugs and touches. This doesn’t stop when we are out and about. He or I will rest our hand on the other’s thigh while traveling, we’ll hold hands in stores and are [...]

Recently in a forum I read about someone who was just starting a D/s relationship and was bringing someone into the home. The dominant stated that she wanted ideas of how to tell her 9 year old daughter about what she might be seeing and the behaviors that the slave she was bringing in would [...]

In a previous post I talked about the idea of adding another person to this relationship. Master and I still have it up in the air as to whether we would do well in a relationship like that. Nothing more has been discussed because we don’t have any prospective people to consider.
Master and I have [...]

Reading a Fetlife thread has me thinking about myths that newcomers seem to think about when they learn about BDSM and especially the D/s lifestyle. One in particular that I’ve seen recently….
The lifestyle is not an excuse to sleep around with as many people as possible. It’s not set up like a kid in a [...]

So you’ve had a pretty nice talk with someone on chat and then they say something that doesn’t jibe with you. Does it lead you straight to think that this person is a wannabe? How do you know? There are several times that I’ve had to step back and ask myself is this person just [...]

Master has plans for lots of service and sex and debauchery for this weekend. I’m feeling better about my body and my arousal is slowly climbing. I’ve been in such a funk lately I feel so bad that he’s had to put up with me. I’ve not been sexual, I’ve not been needy and he’s [...]

I’m not horny today. Master is obviously very horny. So, what does he do but ask me to write about sex to get me turned on. I don’t think I’ll get turned on just by writing about sex or even thinking about sex. There is something today that’s just telling me to be nonsexual. I’m [...]

If you’ve been reading my blog you know that I St John’s Wart has been keeping my moods in check and balancing out the lows and highs so that I’m happier longer and less stressed with situations that I can’t change. I stopped taking them about 3 weeks ago without telling Master.
Since then there has [...]

I hate bad news, but I’ve got some sitting in my back pocket that I’ve postponed sharing with you all. Master and I will not be going to Shibaricon. We just couldn’t come up with all the funds we need. I’m still down about and hopefully we can start saving early to attend next year. [...]

Yesterday was a battle of pig-headedness. Neither of us was communicating well and neither of us got what we wanted because of it. There were so many times I wished we could just rewind the day and start over.
A bit of back story… Master asked for a blow job. He asked for a specific blow [...]

There’s this moment, when he looks at me and does that little wink of his that reminds me just how fun, loving and fabulous my life has been with him around. I guess I don’t say it enough here on this blog but I love my Master completely; with my entire being.
I’ve done a lot [...]

Ok, so I don’t know what to write about so Master comments, “How about that you aren’t exercising like you’re supposed to and you’ll get caned like last week.”
Uh-huh.
I’m being bad. I hate caning and yet it’s not keeping from not doing the exercise. Anyone want to know why? Do I think that pain [...]

Mara asks, What are the things you always do for Master? (again, i.e. with me, I always go barefooted around the house, and always wear my toe rings and anklet)
I always wear my collar. It only comes off to be cleaned. I always get out of my work clothes as soon as I enter the [...]

There are tasks I just really don’t like. When Master assigns them but doesn’t give a time frame for completion they sit… and sit… and sit. I can’t wrap my head around the truth of the matter. Master requested that I do something for his pleasure, not mine. This is becoming the case with the [...]

I’m going to ShibariCon, I’m going to ShibariCon! Yes, I know I’ve posted before about going, but this time it’s official; I’ve paid the registration, Master has already been registered for a month, the hotel reservation has been made and all we need to do is save our pennies so that we can afford it [...]

I’ve been sick the past few days, some sort of stomach bug I can’t complain. It came on all of a sudden on Tuesday and I’ve had that icky feeling the past few days. I’m going to have to go to work tomorrow because I just can’t miss another day. I’ll feel so far behind.
I [...]

From My Bottom Smarts Spanko Brunch: What traits make a great spanker?
A great spanker is as unique and individual as the spankee. When I was first exploring BDSM I couldn’t tell you the difference between one person’s play style and another. Now I can see it within moments of their first strike.
The traits I see [...]