BDSM is Love

My diet and exercise update isn’t full of progress I’m afraid. I’ve done more exercise recently than I have in the past but my eating is still out of control. I really need to reign it in and get under 1800 calories a day. The only way to do that is to go hungry sometimes. [...]

I went to the Dr yesterday to find out the results of yet another round of testing. I do not have PCOS, nor do I have Cushings Syndrome. Yay me! I do have a low but not insanely low thyroid count so he is retesting and when he gets the results of that we will [...]

Well, after 3 weeks of nausea with the Prozac and a recommendation from the Dr to try taking it at night I have switched medicines. The nights have been horrible and I just can’t stay asleep, it’s not restful sleep and it’s worrying Master to boot. I’m going to start Celexa on Friday morning. We’ll [...]

This holiday weekend was pretty good overall. Friday and Saturday were great. I could have traded Sunday in for something better.
First Master and I got to really go at each other sexually and I was hungry for it all. I did a striptease and blow job for him in the living room which he said [...]

I went to the Dr yesterday. I think I have found the Dr that will help me lose weight and is working to make sure that no health issues are hindering it. I came prepared with a list of things I wanted him to check into. He sat and listened to me and asked questions [...]

I went from basic blahs on Friday to full blown depression this weekend. I have battled depression several times in the past and am taking St. John’s Wart to try and balance my moods a bit better. This episode has hit me hard.
It’s all related to my body image I think. I am feeling really [...]

I’m having issues with concentration today. I’m hoping to get better but with all of the floods happening in the area every bit of news I catch is distracting me from doing anything but watch about the weather. I worry about everyone that the floods have displaced. I am troubled about work and the one [...]

Just a short post today. I have a lot of thoughts rolling around in my head; mostly sparked from FetLife and would like to formulate them before I post them. I do need to update everyone on my diet and exercise so here goes!
This week was really good with exercise. I did the Walk Away [...]

I’m not really sure why I feel this way today. I’m 5 days into my vacation and I’m feeling stir crazy, easily edgy and not submissive at all. Master has about had it. I gave him one of those half assed blow jobs and I know he wants a decent one soon. I’ve been neglecting [...]

As an incentive to see how I’m doing I’ve readded a ticker to my sidebar. You can watch how I progress to my goal for Shibaricon next year. I hope to be 50 lbs+ lighter by then. Here’s to good progress and positive results!
I’ve been exercising as scheduled with Master’s help. The access to the [...]

Last week I wrote about my issues with exercise and dieting in general. After that post Master spoke to me about how he doesn’t like the depression I get into when I don’t do well with my diet. It was a difficult discussion for me because I knew that if I asked him to take [...]

So, my good intentions from last week’s weigh in didn’t go well. I haven’t done any exercise even though I get reminders in my mailbox every single day. I just end up deleting them after the day is up, knowing another is coming. I’m trying to figure out how to exercise at work other than [...]

I’m not doing so well keeping up with my blogging rule. I know that it will end up in the punishment book to be atoned for on Sunday. I was supposed to write a letter to Master on Sunday and I didn’t blog yesterday either. Now I’m writing to kinda make up for yesterday even [...]

Master had me take a sleeping pill last night to help me sleep. I didn’t stay asleep as I had hoped but I think the sleep I did get was more restful. I don’t feel as tired today. Thank God.
Master and I have started a bit of a sexual banter with each other. This is [...]

I’ve gained 5 lbs in one week. Surprising right? Well not as bad as the fact that I asked Master to be my conscience and I never listened to him. He’d ask me if I really needed to eat something and I’d just go ahead and do it. It’s my own darn fault and like [...]

It never seems to work. I try to compartmentalize my diet and health changes and that blog just sits idle. I guess I really can’t keep more than one blog. It’s all me so why do I have to try to separate it. I guess I was just trying to sort out the boring stuff [...]

It’s Sunday again, and you know what that means. I have stepped on the scale to see if this week will show improvement from last week. If you all remember I was up quite a bit because of my period but that’s over now. I was 318.5.
Today’s weigh in: 313.5
Yup, that’s right, I stood on [...]

This morning I got up to weigh feeling very hesitant to step on the scale. I’ve not been doing so well with my food intake at night and I’m also on my period so I knew I was bloated and the number was going to be off. I’m hoping that next week has a better [...]

Reward this week if I reach 65 mins exercise: $5 towards new sofa/futon ($240 to go)
Monday 11-12

Calories: 1947
Water: 60 oz.
Exercise: 0 minutes

Tuesday 11-13

Calories: 1993
Water: 80 oz.
Exercise: 0 minutes

Wednesday 11-14

Calories: 1855
Water: 80 oz.
Exercise: 15 minutes

Thursday 11-15

Calories: 1792
Water: 80 oz
Exercise: 0 minutes

Friday 11-16

Calories: 2240
Water: 80 oz
Exercise: 20 minutes

Saturday 11-17

Calories: 1636
Water: 50 oz
Exercise: 10 minutes

Sunday 11-18

Calories: untracked
Water: 30 [...]

Reward this week if I reach 60 mins exercise: $5 towards new sofa/futon ($245 to go)
Monday 11-5

Calories: 1923
Water: 65 oz.
Exercise: 0 minutes

Today I was off balance emotionally. I felt like I couldn’t get enough done, even though I accomplished almost everything on my to do list. I didn’t eat a healthy dinner (I had 3 [...]